There once was this cool, super sick kid named Pimple Boy. He had a lot of pimples but no one really made fun of it for him because he was cool about it. He called himself Pimple Boy. How cool is that?
So, ok. This Pimple Boy was so cool mainly because of his room. His room was sick. He had a waterbed, a flat-screen TV, a Nintendo, and a mini-fridge. He had everything...or so he thought. This cool pimple kid still was missing something in his life...and that something was love.
Pimple Boy had this huge crush on this girl from his class. Her name was Fart Girl. Fart Girl was so cool. Her hair was nice and she had a nice smile. The kids called her Fart Girl for a reason, however. She farted all the time. It was wild. Everyday was just one huge fart for her.
To Pimple Boy, Fart Girl was everything. He tried a lot to win her over. He tried making a fart noise under his arm. He tried making a fart noise with his hands. He even took an equine laxative. His friend Horse Man gave him this laxative to make him fart long and good.
Nothing worked.
One day Pimple Boy jumped up and down on his waterbed. He was great at that. The bed broke and water went everywhere. Pimple Boy drank up all the water from the bed before his mom got home.
The waterbed water combined with the equine laxative got rid of Pimple Boy's pimples.
He was cured. No scarring or anything. He was just a pimple-less teenage boy.
The next day at school, Fart Girl came up to him. "Hey, big boy. What's your name?" She bit her lip.
"Uh, I'm the Boy Formally Known as Pimple Boy," said the Boy.
"Wow, I bet you used to have so many pimples. I can't believe we haven't met before." Fart Girl rubbed his chest. She was totally coming on to him.
"Oh, we actually have met. Many times." Pimple Boy was confused. He wanted Fart Girl to be in love with him, but this seemed strange.
"Fart Girl, can I ask you something?"
"Anything, Boy Formally Known as Pimple Boy." Fart Girl ran her fingers through the Boy's hair.
"Why are you attracted to me? Is it because of my dashing good looks and nice skin?" At that moment, Fart Girl let out a fart so deep and loud it broke the sound barrier. Pimple Boy died.
Fart Girl held Pimple's limp body. "Yes, Pimple Boy, yes." She said. She threw his body in the river and never farted again.
Just goes to show you, kids, being shallow can be tight sometimes and not every relationship has to be super serious. Especially, not right away.
Lighten up.
THE END
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